Trying to date is really not fun at all. I feel like I should just stop trying at this point. I feel like I need to shift gears and change direction so I can meet men that I would have things in common with, organically. I guess that 's all anyone really wants is to be around people that they click with and meet people the old fashioned way. I kind of got to the end of my rope when yet ANOTHER 60 year old man is e mailing me like were going to meet and go out. Yes on some level, I feel like a horrible person for having the reaction of 'ick' when this happens. These are not youthful looking men either. It's fine that I am not comfortable dating someone so much older than I am. I am well into my 40's but can walk amongst 30 somethings undetected. I always get into debates about my age when people find out. I don't lie about how old I am because I don't have the energy for it, but I am tempted to on line because I am tired of 60 year old men hitting me up like we are peers. 40 is the perfect age as far as relationship material goes. Having fun and going out can be in their 30's or late 20's but I can't see getting serious with a 28 year old, but I would never say never.
There is the physical attraction aspect of meeting people. A wide range of men find me to be attractive, but I can't say the feeling is mutual 90% of the time. The other 10% is a hodge podge of men who are already in relationships, emotionally unavailable due to work schedules, financial problems, or the cinderella syndrome. As if they are walking around with this invisible glass slipper that they are trying to find the owner of. Meaning this perfect woman they have crafted and will not deviate from. Oh yeah and pot smokers. Sometimes they are broke, pot smoking, under employed cinderella chasers that if they would just grow the hell up I would deal with them. I watch the show undateable and almost can't laugh sometimes because it hits too close to the bone. I don't like feeling that I have to completely change who I am in order to be attractive to relationship oriented guys. Notice I didn't say 'hot guys'. Hot guys are overrated. A guy that is hot to me, won't be to the next girl. The things I find hot, most of the time aren't physical attributes. We all want an attractive mate, but can we handle all the baggage that comes along with that? I might say I have been avoiding that my whole life. Or when I did try, I was doing it all wrong. It's so ironic how when you are young, taught and beautiful you have no clue of what you are worth and most likely act like you aren't worth anything. When you figure it out when you are older, the struggle to be attractive by society's standards is real. Or you just don't care anymore and then you get what you get.
Sex gets really complicated when you are of a certain age and single too. You want more of it, but if you get it and you aren't in a committed relationship you decrease your chances of being in one as a woman. It's the opposite for men. But as men age, they have to have money to get 20 year old girls to have meaningless sex with them. Getting sex isn't the problem. Getting meaningful, satisfying sex is.
lesigh
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